Covering them with Shame

Most of us have a really high view of David.  Many of us haven’t studied 1 & 2 Samuel.  Those of us who have may have a slightly or even radically different view of David.  Yes, he was a man after God’s heart (1 Samuel 13:14 (here @ BibleGateway)), but he was not exemplary in his behavior.

In 2 Samuel 18:33 – 19:7 (here @ BibleGateway) we read about David’s reaction to the death of his rebellious, betraying son, Absalom.  In 19:5 – 6 (here @ BibleGateway) we Joab rebukes David, saying, 

Today you have covered with shame the faces of all your servants, who today have saved your life and the lives of your sons and daughters, the lives of your wives, and the lives of your concubines, by loving those who hate you, and by hating those who love you. For you have shown today that princes and servants are nothing to you; for I know this day that if Absalom were alive and all of us were dead today, then you would be pleased. 

As a leader David, diminished what his people did for him by not showing gratitude for their risking their lives to protect him, restore him to the throne, and punish one who not only rebelled but cruelly shamed him before Israel.

One of the lessons we can learn from this is that our reaction to people who are doing things for us is important.  Those who are close to us, our wives, children, grandchildren will do things for us and we need to be effusive in our gratefulness.  If we are  not we are ignoring their demonstration of love and effectively pushing them away from us.  It is not quite covering them with shame but at some level it has as similar impact.

Growth by Praying for Others

I often ask others how I can be praying for them.  There is also another question I ask; I wrote about that here.  

A few weeks back, I asked a man for whom I have a lot of respect, how I could be praying for him.  He replied that he was anxious.  Later as I pondered his request – I want to be clear he had reason to be anxious – it occurred to me that when we are anxious, it is evidence of, possibly several deficiencies in our understanding and/or our relationship with Him.

We all may have Philippians 4:6 – 7 (here @ BibleGateway) memorized, but that doesn’t mean that we find it easy to live that out.  We still get anxious about “nothing.”  Psalm 139:3 (here @ BibleGateway) reminds us that God has scrutinized our path*.  That word means that He has examined our path beyond how a civil engineer examines the aggregate used to mix the concrete in our roads.  So in a real sense when we are anxious we are not trusting Him.

Nothing comes our way without Him knowing.  Nothing comes our way without intention.  Personally, I need to be continually reminded of that truth.  By asking my friend how I could pray for him, I was reminded and challenged in my own trust of God’s scrutiny of my own life’s path.  

Yet another example of the genius of the Lord’s commands to us.  We are to love one another, and pray for one another in so doing we are exhorted, challenged, and built up not only in our relationships with one another but also in our walk with Him.

*I have written a lot on this Psalm in this blog, there are several posts if you would like to see them type Psalm 139 in the “Search This Blog” tool at the top of the column next to this post.  Then I would suggest sort by date.

Loss

Have you ever had loss in your life?  Fired from a job?  Betrayed by people you considered your friends?  Had a financial reversal?  A difficult diagnosis?  Had a loved one taken from you?

Consider Psalm 3 (here @ Bible Gateway).  David was betrayed and exiled by his son.  That is loss at a level that is hard to wrap one’s head around.  From being a king placed by God, David is reduced to fleeing for his life.

David though, does not value or hold on to his reputation, his wealth, or his position.  Rather he holds onto the Lord.

When all seems against us, like David, we need to hold on to the Lord, no one, or nothing else.

Bill Bryan Memorial

Bill Bryan was the chaplain at Dallas Theological Seminary when I studied there.  My wife was in Mothers of Pre-Schoolers, MOPS, with his wife Shirley, the entire time that we were there.  Jenny became very close to Shirley.

After I graduated, the Fuller institute asked me to move my family of six to Pasadena to take over management of the project on which I had been working for the past year and a half.  Jenny and I flew to CA, and she looked for housing while I worked on three seminars with Carl George.

That week she looked at 110 houses, none of which we could afford.  At the end of the week I told Carl that we could not make it work financially, and he told me I would need to find somewhere else to work.

I was thinking through that as well as what I could do on our flight back to Dallas.  Jenny was very quiet.  Half way back she reminded me that it was her 40th birthday.  In the midst of the stress and drama, I had forgotten.  I made my first cellular phone call from an airplane to get a cake ready for us when we landed.  But that did not make a dent.

Several days later, Bill and Shirley joined us for dinner as a surprise for Jenny.  That helped get me partially out of the dog house.

That was the people they were.  That snippet did not come close to many of the stories I have heard.

His memorial service was yesterday.  His three sons spoke.  It would be worth your time as a father to hear what they had to say.  It will set a high bar for you as a father.  I do not know how long this link will be available.  I highly recommend that you watch this, click here.  The service is a bit down the page...worth looking for it.

Also, Dr. Mark Bailey's message was the best I have ever heard at a memorial service.

Accountability

You have probably heard of accountability groups.  You may be in one.  There is a lot of talk and a lot written on holding each other accountable.

You may have heard about or experienced the use of questions in these groups.  Here is a list of several, here are five that I have experienced:

1. Have you been with a woman anywhere this past week that might be seen as compromising?
2. Have any of your financial dealings lacked integrity?
3. Have you exposed yourself to any sexually explicit material?
4. Have you spent adequate time in Bible study and prayer?
5. Have you given priority time to your family?
6. Have you fulfilled the mandates of your calling?
7. Have you just lied to me

This idea of accountability has gained a lot of traction in the Church.  One problem, the word “accountable” does not appear anywhere in the text of the Bible as a directive or description of the relationship between individual believers.  Instead the word is used to describe our relationship to God.  Check out:

• Daniel 6:2 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Ezekiel 3:18 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Ezekiel 3:20 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Ezekiel 33:6 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Ezekiel 33:8 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Ezekiel 34:10 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Jonah 1:14 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Romans 3:19 (here @ Bible Gateway) (not only the only time the English word appears it is the only use of the Greek word in the New Testament)

You will note that in the Bible the idea of accountability in these texts, and they are the only places that the English word “accountable” appears, is toward God not toward man.  By the way these are all the passages in our English Bibles that have any Hebrew or Greek word translated accountable...

So what do we make of this?

The Bible does give us direction on how we are to engage with one another (not an exhaustive list):

• John 13:34 – 35 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Ephesians 4:11 - 16 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• 2 Timothy 2:24 – 25 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• 2 Timothy 3:14 – 17 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• 2 Timothy 4:1 – 2 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Hebrews 3:13 (here @ Bible Gateway)
• Hebrews 10:24 – 25 (here @ Bible Gateway)

The words used in these passages are words like build up, encourage, reprove, rebuke, exhort, teach, correct, and arguably the most important, love one another.  I ran across an article that had a paragraph that seemed spot on:

In The Duty, Owen writes that church members should, of their own accord, “assemble together, to consider one another, to provoke unto love and good works, to stir up the gifts that are in them, yielding and receiving mutual consolation by the fruits of their most holy faith.” During these gatherings, Owen tells believers to warn the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak (1 Thessalonians 5:14 (here @ Bible Gateway)), help one another understand the Word of God better (Acts 18:26 (here @ Bible Gateway)), help one another be on guard against the heart-hardening effects of sin (Hebrews 3:13 (here @ Bible Gateway)), gently restore those who have are trapped in sin (Galatians 6:1 (here @ Bible Gateway)), encourage and build up one another in the faith (1 Thessalonians 5:11; Jude 20 (here @ Bible Gateway)), and pray for one another (1 John 5:16 (here @ Bible Gateway)). – How John Owen Would Run an Accountability Group.  Links to Bible Gateway added.

It would seem from considering the text of the Bible that possibly the idea of holding one another accountable is a means of attempting to deal with sin by asking questions rather than building up one another in our relationship and dependence on Christ and the Holy Spirit.

What do you think?

Incremental Victories

There have been issues in my life and ministry that the Lord immediately changed.  One was my focus on what was ultimately important, not airplanes but people.  Another was an immediate and sustained hunger for His Word.

But other issues took time.  Swearing was one.

Some I was able to overcome, later attempted, with some success, to reassert themselves.

Some, like journaling, I was off and on with for years and now has become consistent.

In ministry engaging people in the Word is a strength, but prayer is a challenge.

The point is not everything in this journey is easy.  Further, things that we may have nailed down today, may break loose tomorrow.

Why?

There are probably more reasons than we can possibly cover in a short post.  Someone has probably written a book about this.  But I find help on this in some places in the Word.  First, in Exodus 23:29 – 30 (here @ Bible Gateway).  When the Lord was sending Israel into the land, it was not done overnight.  It was a process.  He wanted them to take the land incrementally.  The stated purpose was so that the land would not become desolate.

I resist allegorizing the text.  Detest is probably a better representation of my reaction to that type of reading of the text.  With that firmly in mind Romans 15:4 – 5 (here @ Bible Gateway) tells me that this passage is given for my instruction.

Now it is not the case that I am currently engaged in a war of conquest of a large land mass.  It is the case that I have been enlisted in a project to help change the culture of a number of communities in which I am involved.

In both the war and the project there is resistance.  In my case if there was not resistance I would find myself in a situation where people would want help and because there were not enough leaders equipped to give that help, the communities would become frustrated and much future opportunity would be lost.

Romans 15:4 – 5 (here @ Bible Gateway) reminds us that this is a journey, a mission that requires perseverance.  Facilitating change, is part of that journey both personally and in a community of believers.

From time to time I forget that.  When I do, discouragement surfaces.  I have to be reminded that this is a journey of perseverance.  That requires me to abide in Him, in His Word, and in fellowship with others that are pulling with me in the traces.

Homesick

I search through the blog before I write to see if I have already written on a verse or a topic before I write.  Did that tonight and ran across “Sorry for Your Loss” and changed what I was going to write.

As I read through that post, I began to weep.  It has been a hard 18 months.  We have experienced 4 deaths and 3 births.  The last death was of my daughter in law.  We came close to losing the newest grandson a few weeks ago.

Last year I started reading How Long, O Lord? Reflections on Suffering and Evil, 2nd ed. by D. A. Carson.  On page 130 he says:

Christians ought to be developing a kind of homesickness for heaven. Some want to warn us against being so heavenly minded that we will be no earthly good. I suppose that is possible, but I haven’t found anyone like that yet. Puffed up piety and sentimental religion can make one think much of heaven and love no one down here, but those who are genuinely heavenly minded have the highest incentive to serve well here: they are laying up treasure in heaven.

I wrote about that at some level in “Sorry for Your Loss”.  I have heard that some were looking forward to going home, dad was.  In the past I have wondered at that.  I do no longer.  At a significant level, I long to be reunited with those I know, to meet the siblings I never knew, and the grandchild that is already there, and to talk with my daughter in law and see the joy when she sees her daughter again.

I think that I am beginning to understand.  I am getting homesick.

Bringing our Loved ones and Friends to the Lord

You may remember that the last book in our Bible is Revelation.  You may be put off by its imagery and apocalyptic discourse.  At a significant level, I am.

In one of the studies that the Lord allowed me to lead, I was asked several times to cover Revelation.  Each time I was able to deflect the request to another book.  However, at one point I finally gave in.

Typically I do not use commentaries in my study.  Why?  For the most part the commentaries do not address the questions that I bring to them.  I have found that if I invest the time in prayerful observation, that John 16:13 continually is validated as true.

But for this study, Revelation, I acquired multiple commentaries.  Most of them did not help, two did.  But again it was the prayerful observation that yielded most in the study.

With that in mind look at Revelation 9:20 – 21 (here @ Bible Gateway).

I have been in many conversations over the years that went somewhat along the lines of, “If only God would punish __________, people would repent and follow Him…”

However, these verses seems to throw buckets of cold water on that notion.  It seems that punishment for sin, no matter how dire, will not bring men to repentance.  If anything they seem to dig in their heels and fight harder for the right to continue in sin.

Rather, it is the draw and conviction by the Holy Spirit alone that will bring men to dependence on Him.  To accept the lavishly gracious offer of a life free from the reality of the punishment that our sin demands.  To accept life from Him rather from the death that we have purchased with our rebellion.

So, if you are concerned about one of your family or friend’s standing with Jesus.  Rather than continually push them or guilt them toward Christ, pray.  Pray that the Spirit will draw them to the Lord.  This combination is most clearly shared by Paul in 2 Timothy 2:24 – 25 (here @ Bible Gateway).  We share in kindness knowing it is the Lord that grants their decision to change their mind about Him, to repent.

It is not in our control.  That is a real challenge for most of us.

Oops

Several years ago, 39 to be exact, my wife and I were at a staff training center for a Christian organization.  I was required to work at a part time job 20 hours per week, study the Bible 20 hours a week, and then I could go to the dorm to which we were assigned to lead the ministry there that was usually more than 20 hours a week.

This one is right, I think...

One of the Bible studies we did was on spiritual multiplication.  The directions for the study were fairly broad.  We were to look for generational chains in the text of the Bible and make observations about what we saw.  Essentially it meant that we scanned the Bible for these, it was before personal computers and Bible programs…

Genesis 5 was one of the places that I spent some time.  I was intrigued by the way the men’s lives were described, Genesis 5:6 – 7, for example.  So having an engineering scale and being a bit of a geek, I drew out the chapter in time scale.  I was floored to realize that a couple of these men died in the flood…

Not so fast…

This morning my reading brought me around to Genesis 5 again.  I was curious so I opened up one of my graphics programs and redrew the illustration, this time using the computer to set the time scale.  Apparently, I had miss measured the two men I thought died in the flood…

The point is, I make mistakes.  There are things that I think I have figured out in the Word, that on a closer look I may have misread or missed something in the context or misapplied a cross reference, and honestly there have been times I have taken things out of context.

Doesn’t matter how careful I am, I still can make a mistake.  That is one reason that when I take a position on a passage, I try to hold it tentatively.  I find that interacting with others that have studied the same passage is a significant help.  It both helps me because they will see things I did not, and sometimes they will point out errors I have made.

This Christian life thing is a journey.  There are times that I can get off track.  The great thing is that I do not have to be perfect throughout this cruise.  Jesus has already been perfect for me.  Frankly, it isn’t about getting everything right anyway is it?  Really, it is about getting to know the one who was perfect for me better.

Disciple or Pharisee

For the past few months I have been working with a group that is focused on increasing the level of discipleship in their community.  It is a great objective.  A noble goal.

In the past few weeks I have been reflecting on the effort.  John 5:39 – 47 has continually come to mind as I have pondered this.  There Jesus was speaking to the Pharisees, the leaders of the Jews, these folks had the first five books of the Bible memorized.  They studied the scripture.  Paul was one of their number.  He outlines his experience and commitment in Philippians 3:4 – 16.

The knowledge of the Scripture, while crucial – after all Jesus tells us in John 15:7 we are to abide in His Words – is not, in and of itself, enough.  The whole purpose of what we do in discipleship, the purpose of the disciplines is to know Christ.

If we are doing all of the “right” Christian activities and yet our knowledge of Him is not increasing; we are not drawing closer to Him, we are badly missing the point.

It is not about our doing or knowing the right things.  It is about knowing the right Person, Jesus.

If you know someone who is focused on knowledge and not relationship, pray for an opportunity soon to encourage them to readjust, realign their thinking.

Trust in Relationships

Many of us revel in our friends.  We count ourselves – lucky is probably not the right word – rich if we have a solid group of good friends.  That is appropriate, Jesus surrounded himself with men to be with him.  A cursory reading of Acts reveals a long list of names of men and women who were associated with Paul’s ministry.  Proverbs 18:24 is both encouraging and a warning on this.

Psalm 55 surfaced in my reading program yesterday (M'Cheyne Reading Plan).  This Psalm has been one that has gripped and guided my journey with God several times over the years.  This time I was struck by 12 – 14 and 16.

Reading through this just after studying John 13 – 19 probably has colored what I am seeing here.  Christ was betrayed by Judas, one of his “friends”.  He quotes Psalm 41:9 when He reveals the betrayer to John (John 13:18).  Psalm 55:12 – 14 also could describe Jesus’ relationship with Judas.

All of us have had disappointments in relationships with close friends.  Some have been betrayed, probably not at the level that Christ was betrayed.  But look at how Christ viewed that betrayal.  Shortly after Judas leaves, Jesus in the garden prays that His Father would glorify the Son so that the Son could glorify the Father (John 17:1).  In fact, if we look through the gospel, we find that Christ was laser like focused on that purpose; glorifying, magnifying His Father.

Psalm 55:16 then, for me takes on a more significant weight, especially coming right after 12 – 14.  David responds to the betrayal by calling on God.  Putting this haphazardly together, it occurs to me that there are times that I trust in my relationships.  As much as a gift of God friends are, trusting in them inches up on idolatry.  Rather it seems that in all of my relationships I have to continually trust God.

When Judas betrayed Christ, Christ trusted His Father to glorify Him.  If in my relationships I trust God, then at some level, I cannot be disappointed.  I can trust that what happens my Father will use both in my life and in the life of my friend.

This gives me a more certain ground on which to stand.  This allows me to pray more effectively for those who may have injured me.  This allows me to have more appropriate expectations of friends.  It gives me more questions to bring before the Lord.

It gives great peace.