Insufficient

There is much to do.  When I think about all that needs to be done, I am brought nearly to despair.  Focus for a moment on just Matthew 6:33.  We are to seek first God’s Kingdom.  That is before our plans, our jobs, our income.  In fact, in the context Christ tells us not to worry about those things.

One aspect of seeking first His Kingdom is to pray.  Ok, for what?  Well for me that means my family, which includes both my wife’s and my parents, our siblings and their families, our kids and their spouses and children.  That is the start, then there is our church, its leaders, literally hundreds of people who we know who are in the ministry working in different works.  Then there are those who have given to support the work that we have done.  On top of that are the people with whom we meet.  The list gets really long there are 60+ men who have invested in my life.  How am I to pray for all of these people?  How am I to keep up with what needs to be prayed for?  It gets to the point that insufficient does not even begin to capture how useless I feel in trying to pray over all of this…

I begin to understand Paul’s admonition to pray without ceasing in 1 Thessalonians 5:17.  So how do I deal with this?  I have made the daily lists, the rotating list for each day – full disclosure – it does not work for me.

What I am having to learn to do is come to God, to worship Him.  To sit at His feet.  Not to bring this bushel basket of names and needs before Him, but to come, sit, and listen.  I wait.  I ask Him what is important to bring to Him that day.  I am beginning to hear more clearly His answers.  He brings people and situations to mind and we engage over those.  More and more He is bringing people and issues to mind during the day, I am learning to pray then, in the moment – so it is not quite without ceasing yet.  It still feels insufficient, weak, but I am growing…