If you are not in the book that reveals the infinite character of the overwhelming God we serve on a regular basis. And if you are not doing that on your own, just you and God, not reading a commentary or the notes in your study Bible, or following someone else’s fill in the blank study, you are filtering your experience through the walk of another. If you need help. I will help you. If you know how and are just not doing it, get with it.
You will drown in grace.